Watch True Blood – Save Yourself Online S05E12

Save Yourself

True Blood - Save Yourself Online S05E12

HBO’s hit vampire drama “True Blood” was nothing but crazy if you’ve watched the season five finale of the show, titled “Save Yourself”. Save yourself, indeed! If you have yet to watch Sunday’s episode of the show, turn back now as this post contains nothing but spoilers as we round up the fifth season. If you’ve missed the show, you can read our full and detailed recap here.

Last week’s ‘True Blood’ episode “Sunset” saw Bill dispatching Jessica to turn Jason Stackhouse into a vampire under the new regime, while Sookie rallied the other Faeries into fighting back against Russell Edgington. So, what will the latest episode of ‘True Blood’ bring?

Let’s start with the first death, which coincidentally is also the show’s biggest loss – Russell Edgington has finally been put down. And despite Eric’s episode-wide amazing timing, it seems to have been the Faeries wot done it. Given that the Faeries have done frick-all for the entire season – barring procreating with the nearest drunk – the final score is Russell Nil, Faeries One. Which seems a tad unfair, no? And while it had to happen, and while it was glorious that Eric was present, and possibly partly responsible, it is a massive shame that the batshit ex-King will no longer be gracing Bon Temps with his psychotic presence. RIP Russell, you will be sorely missed.

And when it looked like we would finally get a bit of that old Russell we love so much, he gets staked in the lamest of ways. It’s absolutely fitting that Eric is the one to kill him, but it deserved a moment we would never forget, not a random killing before the opening credits. This also brings up another peccadillo- why are vampires, particularly ancient and powerful ones, so damn easy to kill? After this season they seem more fragile than your average human. What’s the benefit of longevity when you’re able to be dispatched as easy as a baby vamp fresh from the ground?


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Watch True Blood – Everybody Wants To Rule The World Online S05E09

 Everybody Wants To Rule The World

True Blood - Everybody Wants To Rule The World Online S05E09Terry’s crisis of conscience, Bill’s crisis of faith and Andy Bellefleur’s crisis of confidence all came to a head in this week’s minor-plotline-wrapping episode of “True Blood.” Here’s what happened in Bon Temps last night.

The Authority is on the rise after abolishing the law that says vampires can’t feed in public, leading to some chaos in Fangtasia. Sookie is getting closer to finding out who killed her parents but ends up getting held hostage by “Obamas.” We get a flashback at Alcide as a young pup, and it appears he’s had the same haircut for about 20 years.

Last night’s episode of True Blood titled “Everybody Wants to Rule the World” (awesome ‘80s song), felt like the show was finally getting more interesting with just three remaining episodes this season. The writers are building up to what promises to be a bloodbath of a season finale as the vampire revolution is almost to a boiling point. For those who didn’t enjoy the various tertiary plots this season, many of those are neatly wrapping up right about now. Terry’s curse seems to be over, and we finally learned who the Dragon leader was behind the Obama-masked hate group shooting the shifters. But the biggest shocks of the night came from Bill’s betrayal of Eric and Russell taking baby wolf-cub Emma and giving her to his boy-toy Steve Newlin as a pet.

Sookie has Lafayette help her figure out why she’s connected with the spirit of the vampire Warlow. He ends up getting a message from Gran, who tells Sookie she’s “sleeping on top of it.” Under her bed Sookie finds a box full of letters. Jessica assures the police Hoyt is not one of the Obamas. Jason arrives and Jessica says she can no longer feel Hoyt. She’s worried something has happened to him and it will be her fault.


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Watch True Blood – In The Beginning Online S05E07

 In The Beginning

True Blood - In The Beginning Online S05E07The wild ride has just begun and the blood is finally starting to flow. And it’s all in the name of Lilith. “In the Beginning” has surely amped up the excitement in this rather interesting, but treading season of True Blood, whilst also taking an important, pivotal look back to multiple beginning stages of the tragic dramas our zany characters have found themselves wrapped within. Not much could have prepared us for the level of insanity that was delivered on tonight’s wild installment, full of blood, action, exciting confrontations, dark and campy humor, & finally some real story progression.

Yes, Russell, who must have been faking his whole “f*** Lilith” spiel, is actually a Lilith convert. Which also means that he’s sadly now “one of the herd.” Lumped in with the surviving Chancellors, turncoats Salome and Nora, the burned face prisoner and Steve Newlin (“I’m like a tree in the wind”). No, it didn’t make much sense that the opening scene showed the Authority troopers capturing Russell again since we were just going to see him free as a bird in the next scene, but everything wound up taking a turn for the pleasantly bats***. And it was cool to see Godric pop up right at the end and essentially un-brainwash Eric; showing him that Lilith wasn’t even a real, corporeal figure.

Our favorite occasional tavern wench got some interesting news: her magical abilities are finite and will diminish if she doesn’t control them soon. So naturally she stands outside her house and tries to use it all up. Were the fairies telling the truth or is there some way to mystically charge Sookie like an iPhone? Most superheroes seem to go through this choice and as a mere mortal, I have to wonder for a minute if they’re freaking nuts. Who doesn’t want superpowers? Sure, the downsides are being a pawn in dangerous supernatural wars and your love life basically sucks. But it’s not monotonous. Being normal is overrated. But it’s the one thing Sookie thinks she wants. I hope she comes to accept who she really is on her own, not with the help of some insanely hot man.


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Watch True Blood – Let’s Boot & Rally Online S05E05

Let’s Boot & Rally

True Blood - Let's Boot & Rally Online S05E05Whoever gave the True Blood writers some V or whatever it was to suddenly make this season pretty darn brilliant, praise your light. There was surely no title more apt for an episode than this week, where in all of the story lines (though still fractured) some serious shit went down. Few dramas hit their stride as late as a fifth season, but True Blood has come into its own – finally – this year. Yes there have been missteps along the way, but for the most part this mere 50 minutes of television (followed by a “let’s discuss what the heck is going on in Bon Temps right now” video) felt longer and denser than seemed possible. Hit the jump for details on the latest weirdness, and why Hoyt needs to go back home to his mama.

The episode opens with Sookie and Alcide getting their hump on. That is, until Sookie takes a good long look at his pecs and then pukes on his shoes. I also wanted to puke on his shoes. Is anyone else overwhelmed with the sheer number of well-muscled male chests on this show? So that’s of course when Bill and Eric show up to lurk around in black leather jackets and tell Sookie about the Russell situation, and also ask/force her to help them find him. They have until dawn, otherwise their chest harnesses will activate and turn them into tomato sauce, so it’s pretty urgent.

“If I wanted to look like a drag queen, I would’ve raided Lafayette’s closet.” Yeah, she looks good in that corset, but it’s so no Tara. Then again, Tara did the big hair and blue eyeshadow to match it, so she’s gotta be having a little dress-up fun. Trying on her new life. Does Tara really have to stick with Pam? Maybe for the time being as she adjusts, but would Pam make their relationship one of permanent indentured servitude?

Meet your new True Blood villain: Irfit. It turns out that Patrick’s and Terry’s old war buddy, Eller, isn’t a psycho — he’s just running from a fire monster. Eller says they’ve been cursed by an innocent woman they killed as soldiers, who sent “a fertile being of smoke and fire” after them. Terry’s a believer, but Patrick’s not, and they leave Eller tied up in his supposedly fire retardant basement to get attacked by the Irfit, which looks and sounds way too much like the Lost smoke monster for my comfort.


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Watch True Blood – We’ll Meet Again Online S05E04

We’ll Meet Again

True Blood - We'll Meet Again Online S05E04As we promised, True Blood’s “We’ll Meet Again” was full of shockers for Bon Temps’ supernatural residents — and even its few remaining mortals too. I haven’t really been loving True Blood that much this season, but I was happier with this episode because of the final moments . . . and that long-awaited kiss. Let’s get to the best and worst parts of the episode after the jump.

If you hadn’t already guessed, Tara isn’t vampire goo. For making such a drastic leap with her, the show’s writers have yet to do anything truly interesting with the character. Tara finally changes her clothes, and like many of the others, voices her disdain for Sookie’s knack for survival. “She’s always safe,” says Tara. “There’s always some fool that will take a bullet for her.” And though Tara is unknowingly leading the hate-train, it’s not a totally unforeseen remark by Sookie’s former best friend. After all, angry Tara is angry.

But after being treated to two flashbacks’ worth of Pam crying bloody tears over her remembered origins, we know she’s got a heart hidden somewhere under her pink velour sweatsuit, and lo and behold, it makes an appearance again in this episode; after sobbing her way through a confrontation with Eric over the whereabouts of one Russell Edgington, she calls his bluff. If he doesn’t trust her, she says, “then release me and get it over with.”

Even if we do get tired of her, drunk Sookie, newly dubbed “the Angel of Death,” was a refreshing part of this episode. In true “Gossip Girl” fashion, Sookie gets to link up with yet another unattached gentleman on this show now that she’s done with Bill and Eric, but this particular match felt overdue so we were OK with it. And look, Bill’s taking a page out of Edward Cullen’s book and watching creepily outside the window.


Watch True Blood – Turn! Turn! Turn! Online S05E01

Turn! Turn! Turn!

True Blood - Turn! Turn! Turn! Online S05E01True Blood‘s opening act for Season Five was a reminder not only of how chaotic the show has gotten, but also how fun – in the right moments – it remains. Despite the fact that the nonsense level is high (and reaching new heights with every passing year), it’s the little moments in the show – Pam in a Walmart kitten-decal sweatshirt, Bill and Eric’s Excellent Adventures, Lafayette’s visceral mourning, Sookie kicking a tooth under the fridge – that keep us coming back. “Turn, Turn, Turn” gave us plenty of them in between a whirlwind attempt to wrap up a few of last season’s cliffhangers while opening up a host of new problems for Sookie & Co. to deal with. To explore the twists and turns of this new season’s inaugural episode, hit the jump.

Aside from Eric and Bill making a run for it after killing Nan Flanagan, everything else felt exactly the same: the same characters since day one just bumming around Bon Temps and getting involved in wacky, sex and gore-crazed hi-jinx. Yes, fans can scream “But that’s what the show is!” Well, if that’s still the show after five years then you need to expect backlash. At one point, I did thoroughly enjoy this show for what it was – a goofy, outrageous, sassy blood-soaked sex-opera. But there does come a time when that wears thin, and the outrageous moments are no longer shocking. Was anyone really, truly astonished by the fact that Eric has sex with his “sister?”

Instead, Bill and Eric have teamed up for a True Blood “buddy-flick” situation. We’re treated to a taste of their growing bromance early in the episode, as a wounded Bill commands Eric to go on without him, and Eric stubbornly replies, “I’m not leaving you here.” Their newfound camaraderie promises to be one of the most enjoyable aspects of the new season—if it holds.


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